i'll follow my heart (all the way home)
by The People Speak
Summary: the mighty nein are a mess. but they're a family and they love each other. / kisses of the mighty nein, from a tumblr prompt
1. pt i

_i. goodbye kisses_

Caleb watches Yasha closely. The barbarian's shoulders hunch forwards uncomfortably, but she still stands miles taller than Beau, who hovers awkwardly behind her. None of them have quite known what to say about the whole thing.

Fjord is sitting in almost complete silence beside Caleb with Nott on his other side, but arguably he's doing the best of the three. Jester is curled in the back of the wagon with her sketchbook and since she started crying this morning she has said almost nothing to any of them.

Yasha's wail still echoes in Caleb's ears and he lowers his eyes to the ground. He hates this. This is not at all what he signed up for and now he's stuck with it. He would be content to stare at the earth forever, but Beau's startled cry draws his attention. His eyes land quickly on the two women.

Yasha is kneeling and Beau looks taken aback. Caleb watches Yasha lean forward carefully and press a gentle, tender kiss to the coat draped over the grave. Tension bleeds out of Caleb and sadness fills its void. It's a goodbye to a friend she never saw off.

Yasha will leave–they've come to expect it–but this moment at Molly's grave feels more personal than the usual emotions the barbarian shows around them.

* * *

 _ii. hello kisses_

Fjord is watching Nott. The goblin is seated at the bar, drinking heavily from her bottomless flask and Fjord is watching her nervously. Caleb and Beau have been out all day, doing some Empire related thing that they wouldn't explain fully when Jester asked.

Fjord has been stuck on babysitting duty for the rest of the day. Jester has pouted for most of the day because of Beau's exclusion, and Caduceus is content to just meditate or chat with locals, but Nott has been getting steadily drunker. It's not like she can't take care of herself, but Fjord doesn't want her halfling disguise to slip.

The tavern door swings open and the two Empire kids trudge in. Beau's sporting a black eye and Caleb has soot smudged on his cheek but they're both smiling, something rare when it appears on Caleb's face. Nott springs up when she sees them and runs as well as she can across the bar.

She ends up with her arms wrapped around Caleb's lower half and she presses an awkward kiss to his arm where she traps it against his side. Caleb's grin falters for a moment before he pats the goblin's head. Fjord relaxes.

* * *

 _iii. breathless kisses_

Jester has the key. Her chest is burning. Her eyes are burning. Her mind is racing and her lips part in a desperate attempt for air and she's not rewarded. Nott is jerking at the trap door at the top of the chamber, but Jester has the key.

She's going to die, and they're all going to die.

Jester's lungs burn and she sends a quick, graceless prayer to the Traveler. Her eyes are about to flutter shut when the water ripples ahead of her. There's a cool pressure on her lips and then, gloriously, _AIR._

Her eyes flash open and she can barely make out through the gloom that Fjord has desperately pressed his lips to her and he has given her his air. It's awkward and his hands are gripping her face with too much desperation.

He pulls back and though Jester can feel the familiar burn of air in her chest, she can see that Fjord has given her all of his air. Her heart twists sickeningly.

* * *

 _iv. heated kisses_

Beau has never felt quite as terrified as she did in that moment. Adrenaline is still rushing through her veins and she can feel her heart pounding. Blood rushes through her ears and she storms forwards.

She parts Caleb and Nott easily and the wizard stumbles at the force of her shove. Yasha watches her approach silently and steps aside, not even getting in the way. Fjord and Caduceus's attention is not directed at her.

Fjord is kneeling beside Jester, watching as Caduceus murmurs a few incantations and Jester's abdomen glows with healing magic.

"You're so stupid!" Beau growls out, throwing herself to her knees. She wraps Jester in her arms without saying another word and presses a firm kiss to the tired tiefling's brow.

Jester twists to look up at the furious monk. She lifts a blue finger and dabs it against the cut on Beau's cheek carefully. Beau feels Jester's familiar magical warmth and she scowls. "Heal yourself, not me." She kisses Jester's horn this time and just holds her friend.

* * *

 _v. first kisses_

Caduceus is meditating when Jester sits down next to him. At first, he does not acknowledge her presence, but she starts to fiddle so he turns towards her carefully. She's tugging on a blue curl with one hand and the other is rubbing at the symbol of her patron.

He says nothing, simply waits for her to talk. She pauses for a moment and looks to contemplate leaving before she lets out a long, shuddering sigh.

"He's with Avantika. I haven't talked to him about anything."

Caduceus puts on a sympathetic smile. Jester is sweet and he hates to see her so sad. Even when discussing this subject usually, she's fired with jealousy, but now she just looks defeated. Caduceus takes Jester's hand. She looks at him and his smile widens a little. He brings it up and kisses it carefully.

Kissing is a slightly foreign form of affection for him still, but he has seen the comfort it can give to people. A familiar smile splits across Jester's face and she squeezes his hand in return.

"I'll talk to him soon," she promises.

* * *

 _vi. post-sex kisses_

Keg's stubble brushes Beau's collarbone. The monk rotates her head to look at her bedmate. They've both shed their clothes and sweat is making them stick together awkwardly.

The dwarf is staring at Beau and they make eye contact. Keg's hand tugs Beau's jaw down and the monk's neck is craned at an awkward angle as their lips brush together lightly.

"Keep looking at me like that, and I'll never leave," Keg whispers.

Beau tightens her arm around the fighter's waist and says nothing.

* * *

 _vii. morning kisses_

Yasha picks awkwardly at her food. She has always been a morning person and has always known that Molly isn't one. She hadn't realized quite how much the rest of the Might Nein like sleeping though until it was just her and Nott sitting at a table in the tavern just after sunrise.

Nott hasn't said much, as is typical, and Yasha makes no attempt to get her to talk. Caleb is the next to descend the stairs, looking haggard with the dark circles under his eyes. He sits between Yasha and Nott and the barmaid flutters by, asking if they needed anything. None of them say a word and the girl backs away, a little alarmed looking.

Caleb brings out a book he'd bought in town and flips through it with Nott leaning in to observe some of the magic enchantments as well. The stairs creak and Yasha glances up to see Molly finally gracing them with his presence. He basically dances over to the table.

Taking advantage of the fact that he's taller than Yasha when she's sitting, he leans over and kisses the direct top of her head. Yasha smiles and watches as he does the exact same to Caleb and then to Nott who both stiffen awkwardly. Molly sinks into his seat and beams.

* * *

 _viii. reluctant kisses_

Avantika's hand is cold and rough from years of work. Her eyes bear into his and she waits patiently for his reaction. Fjord swallows stiffly. Caleb's words echo in his head and his dreams make his stomach swirl.

He stands, walking around the desk, and stands next to her. Avantika rises so that she's a little closer to level with him, but doesn't drop his hand.

Feeling a little ill, Fjord leans in. _For the Nein_ , he thinks desperately and Avantika surges up to meet him, their lips crashing together.

* * *

 _ix. festive kisses_

Jester doesn't drink at the bar. Instead, she and Nott dance and tease and try to distract the competition. In the end, Caleb doesn't need the assist as his opponent passes out face-down on the floor.

She busies herself with the drunken antics of Beau and Molly and Caleb while Fjord drinks so she doesn't have to watch him, but gives Nott the support the little goblin needs to win her round of the drinking contest. There's laughter and cheering and Jester's stomach warms.

It feels like a festival, even though it's just a drinking competition. Beau and Molly try to headbutt as a celebration, but Beau bangs her head on Molly's horns and the two crack up. Even Fjord laughs at the display.

She drags Caleb onto the dance floor and they clumsily waltz for a few steps and Jester giggles uncontrollably.

"You were always a better dancer than me, Astrid," he mumbles awkwardly.

The music in the tavern is loud and everyone is still celebrating. Jester goes up on her tiptoes and kisses Caleb's cheek. "Let's get you to bed, Stinky Man."

* * *

 _x. comforting kisses_

Beau awakes to Jester shaking on the bed across the room, convulsing in her sleep. Beau swears and jumps to her feet. She crosses the room and lays a hand on the cleric's shoulder. Jester shoots up, eyes blown wide and tears staining her cheeks.

Her eyes are wild in a way that Beau knows exactly what Jester had been dreaming about. She doesn't even hesitate. She pulls away and sprints for Fjord's room. She pulls the half-orc almost out of bed before he awakes. He blinks at her blearily, confused and a little upset.

"Jester," Beau hisses at him.

Fjord is then fully awake and leads the charge back to Beau and Jester's room. He rushes to her and holds the trembling tiefling against his chest, kissing the top of her head and cradling her carefully.

Beau pauses in the doorway. The intimacy between the two is deep and she doesn't dare interfere. It is a space that the two, and Yasha, can fill, but Beau will guard her friends until she dies.

* * *

 _xi. 'i thought i'd lost you' kisses_

Nott fires off her last bolt and turns her back on the beast, not waiting to see if her hit connected. She rushes to Caleb's side and struggles to roll him over. His face is streaked with soot from his magic and there's blood in his hair from a nasty gash on his forehead.

Jester kneels next to them just moments later and mutters an incantation. Light shimmers over Caleb's wounds and his eyes shoot open. The blues of his irises are crisp, but unfocused and in pain. The wizard gasps and the tension in Nott's stomach fades.

She squeezes Caleb tight and presses a few furious kisses to his face and cheeks. "I thought you were dead."

The monster roars and the three tense uncomfortably. This isn't over yet.

* * *

 _xii. 'we can't do this' kisses_

Fjord is staring at his hands where they are placed flatly on his knees. His friends surround him in a loose circle. They're sitting on boxes and barrels and Jester has claimed the only stool in the small alcove on the ship.

"She will kill us all," Nott growls.

Caleb and Yasha nod their agreement and Fjord flinches. He has always known this. She's not exactly sane after all.

"Fjord?" Caduceus sounds concerned. "You understand, right?"

"Of course," he says sharply. "We can't do this. We need to go or she'll kill all of us."

They're all watching him, and Fjord waits for the subject to drop. He hopes he's masking his panic well enough, but when Beau shifts, he knows she's seen through him.

"But?" she inquires.

Fjord's defences crack just a little. "She knows about Vandren. I need to know what happened to him."

"Okay," Jester answers meekly. "And then we go."

Fjord nods. He feels as if a weight has been lifted from his shoulders. "And then we go," he affirms.

He holds an arm out and Beau ducks under it, dragging Yasha with her and it spreads around the circle, uniting the Mighty Nein. Fjord kisses the side of Jester's head because she's the closest, but he knows the group knows the affection is for all of them.

* * *

 _xiii. 'come to bed' kisses_

Yasha is watching the clouds darken when Beau finds her. Something heavy twists in her stomach and she knows Yasha will likely be gone when the group awakes in the morning.

"Hey," she starts awkwardly.

The barbarian turns a little, looking a tiny bit surprised. "Hi."

Beau wets her lip and shuffles her feet. "Are you leaving?"

Yasha doesn't reply and Beau steps a little closer. It's a cool evening and Beau mildly regrets her aversion to sleeves. Yasha's eyes drift back to the horizon and the heaviness persists in Beau's stomach.

Without thinking too hard, Beau leans up and kisses Yasha's cheek as lightly as she can. "We've got a room and everything paid for, so you should come inside soon. If you leave though, stay safe."

She doesn't wait for a reaction before heading back into the small rural tavern they're staying at for the night.

* * *

 _xiv. 'you look beautiful' kisses_

Caleb knows that Jester lives to make everyone uncomfortable. Lately, though, she's taken a particular interest in making Fjord flush as dark as he can. They're several hours deep into a market trip and Caleb is starting to regret tagging along with Jester and Fjord instead of going with Beau and Nott.

She doesn't really need any new dresses, but she wanted them and nobody can say no to Jester when she gets an idea in her head. This has led to Fjord and Caleb waiting patiently while Jester tries on a dozen dresses and asks for their opinion on every single one of them.

Her most recent choice is almost the same green as the skin on the upper half of Fjord's head and it's paired with a yellow sash around the middle. Jester's blue skin glows against the bright fabric and she looks very pretty. Caleb looks back at the book he's been perusing and flips another page.

"Well?" Jester asks expectantly.

Fjord coughs and a quick glance at the half-orc tells Caleb that he likes the dress and that he thinks Jester looks great if the dark flush on his cheeks is any indication. Caleb looks back at his book and Jester giggles.

"He thinks it's great and that you look beautiful," he finally says when it seems truly like Fjord has swallowed his tongue.

Jester laughs again and Caleb glances up at her. She blows both men a kiss and waltzes back into the change room teasingly.

* * *

 _xv. 'i'll be right back' kisses_

The woman on the other side of the bar is starting to unnerve them. Nott keeps her hands clenched around her concealed dagger as she narrows her eyes at the elf staring at them.

"What's her deal?" she hisses sharply.

Beau is also studying the woman across the bar. "Not sure, but I'm going to find out. Be right back." Beau drops a brief kiss on Nott's head and is up and heading across the bar before Fjord can grab her and make her stay put. Nott knows that Fjord really doesn't want another bar fight.

Beau doesn't break stride as she slides into the booth across from the elven woman. There's some kind of intense staring contest before there are a few sharp words exchanged. Nott can't hear anything, but she doesn't miss the way Beau's spine goes rigid.

After a second, they both stand and walk over to the table. The elven woman takes in their group before giving Beau another skimming look. Beau has a tiny smirk on her face.

"I'm borrowing your friend here," the elf says without hesitation and grabs Beau by the arm, dragging her towards the stairs towards the second floor.

Caleb and Jester both laugh and Fjord rubs his face. Nott just blinks in surprise.

Caduceus's brow wrinkles in mild confusion. "I thought Beau said she'd be right back."

"Not going to see her until morning," Jester howls through her laughter.

* * *

 _xvi. 'i missed you' kisses_

"Yasha!"

Jester's voice is loud and it carries over the tavern's raucous noise. Beau stiffens and looks up. The barbarian is standing awkwardly in the entrance and Jester has her arms wrapped tightly around the barbarian's middle. Nott jumps up and races over to join the hug. Beau laughs to herself before picking through the crowd to reach the other ladies of the Mighty Nein.

The hug wraps up right as she arrives and Jester grabs Nott, pulling her onto the dance floor after flashing one last grin at Yasha. Yasha has a small smile on her face when Beau finally reaches her.

"Hey," she greets.

Yasha blinks down at her. Contemplation skims across her face before she leans down. Beau goes completely rigid as Yasha's lips press tentatively to the top of her head.

"I missed you guys," Yasha says. Beau melts.

* * *

 _xvii. angry kisses_

It doesn't take a genius to know that Nott is mad at him. She crosses her arms angrily every time he steps near her and turns her head away when he tries to talk to her. She's been mad at him before, but Nott's anger is usually fickle and fades quickly.

This time, it's been three days.

Caleb sits quietly by the fire and stares into the dancing flames. Something itches in the back of his mind as he stares at the fire and it hurts. He remembers pain and anguish and desperation. He rubs his temples and sighs deeply. The others are still asleep or, in Beau's case, out gathering more firewood while he keeps watch.

There's a short cough and Caleb glances up. Nott's arms are folded and she looks mad.

"What are you doing?" she demands.

He waves a hand at the fire dismissively. Nott scowls and grabs his arm, tugging him up. She spins him around and walks him towards the hut.

"You hate fire," she reminds sharply. When they get to the entrance to the hut, Nott tugs his arm down and presses a short kiss to his cheek. "I'm still mad at you for trying to die," she says sharply before spinning and walking off.

* * *

 _xviii. sad kisses_

Jester tucks her knees into her chest and lets her chin rest atop them. She reaches over the edge and lets her fingers trail above the water. She thinks about trying to send another message to her mother, but she decides to save her spells. The ocean is dangerous and who knows when she might need them.

"Jester?"

She stiffens and looks up sharply. Fjord is standing above her, figure tall and imposing, and he looks concerned.

"Are you alright?"

She shrugs in response. "Fine, yes, fine."

He laughs shortly and drops to the deck beside her. "I'm sorry we had to leave so soon. I know how much you care for your mother."

Jester feels her shoulders cave in a little. "Yeah," she mumbles softly. "But, you know, Fjord, I care about you guys too and that's why I'm here."

The wood creaks and Fjord lowers his tall form to the ground next to her awkwardly. He doesn't say anything, just offering a supporting presence. Jester sniffles and leans into him half-heartedly. She tries to push away her sobs, but they spill over. Fjord doesn't leave, he just slides an arm up to pat at her back gently.

After a long moment, Jester exhales and sniffs. She twists her face towards Fjord and presses a soft kiss to his cheek.

"Thanks," she says softly.

* * *

 _xix. in the dark kisses_

Beau swears heavily. They had been doing fine, scrounging in the old shop, but now it's completely pitch black. The window above that had been providing the light had slammed shut and Jester, Caleb, and Beau had been plunged into darkness.

Beau steps forwards, her hands out, and immediately trips. She curses the darkness as she tumbles, crashing into some other form which swears in Zemnian as she takes him down with her. She lands half on top of him, the momentum carrying her lips straight to the corner of his mouth, almost kissing him.

Beau rolls off him immediately and clambers to her feet, wiping her mouth. The window above slams open and Caduceus's head peeks in the opening, a sheepish expression on his face. Caleb looks mostly confused and also a little disgusted at what has just occurred.

"We're never discussing that," Beau declares. Caleb nods shortly and everything is fine until Jester lets out a loud, rambunctious laugh and Beau curses the Traveler and the dark vision that tieflings have.

* * *

 _xx. dying kisses_

The seawater stings his eyes. His chest burns as he swings his gaze through the water. He spots Nott, Beau, and Caleb struggling up near the trapdoor. Caduceus and Avantika are off to his left, swimming upwards desperately, but Caduceus is clutching at his chest.

And Jester is a couple feet below him, her violet eyes wide in panic. Something cold clamps over Fjord's heart as he sees bubbles escape her lips. Her eyes flutter and Fjord turns to swim towards her.

She has the key, he knows, but that's not his only motivation. He grabs for her face, tugging the barely conscious tiefling to him and pressing their lips firmly together. Fjord blows his air into her lungs and Jester seizes against him, eyes shooting open.

With no air left in his chest, their lips part and Fjord feels water rush into its place. Not even Uka'toa will be saving him from this one. As his vision darkens around the edges, Fjord watches as Beau reaches for Jester, dragging the cleric upwards.

* * *

 _xxi. interrupting kisses_

Caleb twists the orb furiously in his hands. It has a very distinct arcane signature, something he's never seen before, even through all of his time spent serving Ikathon. The way the gears and levers and rings all spin are enticing. If someone had wanted to kill him, all they would have to do is hand him the orb, get him sufficiently invested, and then strike him down.

It's a momentary thought that flickers through his brain, but he glances up at the gnome who had been carrying the orb. Her hair is a wild nest, but her eyes are bright and happy as she tickles Frumpkin, playing with the cat like a child.

He glances down, losing himself in the puzzle of the orb. He is a curious man and despite the chaos of the ocean floor, he's been craving an old-fashioned puzzle since he cracked Avantika's journal. One of the rings twists beneath his fingertips and he guides it, following it with his eyes intently.

There's a scuffle of tiny feet in front of him before a gentle kiss presses against his cheek. Caleb freezes.

Twiggy laughs. "You're funny, Mr. Wizard. And your cat is very cute."

* * *

 _xxii. clumsy kisses_

Fjord knocks back another shot. The tavern is alive with music, but Fjord's shoulders are hunched as he tries to blend in at the bar. It doesn't seem to be working as the trio of young women down from him keep giggling and glancing his way. He wishes Molly were here; the tiefling certainly had a way of drawing the attention away from the other members of the Mighty Nein.

He almost stands up and leaves, before someone bumps straight into him and basically falls, completely wasted, onto the stool next to him. Fjord tenses and, out of reflex, nearly summons his sword. He forces the instinct away and realizes he has simply been joined by a very drunk Beau.

The monk's hair is almost completely free of her usual topknot and she gives Fjord a half-smirk through her drunkenness. "You're Mr. Popular over here, aren't you?"

Fjord narrows his eyes, unamused at Beau's teasing. Beau rolls her eyes and pulls the rest of her hair down, looking a bit more like the noble girl she was raised to be. She laughs loudly, and fakely at something Fjord definitely didn't say. She leans in and tries to kiss him on the cheek, but she's drunk and clumsy enough that it lands closer to his ear.

She pulls back and Fjord glances by her to his admirers. The girls have all looked away, apparently disappointed.

Beau fakes a gag and lurches on her stool as she leans away from him. "That was so Jester didn't explode of jealousy and I am never, ever doing that again."

* * *

 _xxiii. desperate kisses_

The first time that Caduceus really goes down in battle is a terrifying moment. Jester knows that the Traveler has blessed her as a healer, but its nothing compared to the help that Caduceus can supply to their friends.

She dashes to the fallen Firbolg, forgetting the skeleton she had previously been engaged in. She heaves his upper body up so he's leaning against her and she hurriedly casts Cure Wounds, pressing her hands to his chest. The blue light of the Traveler crawls across his wounds, but he doesn't awaken.

"Up! Get him up!" Beau yells from nearby.

Jester swallows and sends a quick prayer to the Traveler. She kisses Caduceus's brow and casts Cure Wounds again, with a bit more power, and this time, he stirs. She nearly crumples in relief and she kisses him one last time.

"Oh please don't ever go down again, I'm not doing this again," she murmurs.

* * *

 _xxiv. accidental kisses_

Molly had a habit of getting right up in people's faces when he was talking to them. Especially when he had snuck up on them to try and distract them from casting a ritual spell. Still, Caleb had jolted, thanks to a lack of foresight and perception, when the tiefling had suddenly interrupted him.

The spell fizzled at his fingers and the arcane runes he'd etched into the ground lost their glow. His components were wasted and now he had to start again. Caleb scowled and turned quickly to face Molly, only to bang his head on one of the tiefling's horns.

Caleb lurched back, but Molly surged forwards to stop the wizard from crashing to the ground and somehow Molly's lips found themselves planted right against Caleb's nose. After setting the wizard back on his feet, Molly stepped back, smirked, and walked away.

Caleb frowned.

* * *

 _xxv. distracting kisses_

The man in the dark coat has been following them. Yasha noticed him a couple minutes ago, and from the way that Beau's shoulders have been tightening with tension, she knows the monk has noticed the man as well.

Still, the pair peruses Zadash's market and tries to ignore the presence. None of the bystanders in the market seem to notice their tail, but Yasha lets her guard stay up. They finally find the stall with the components that Caleb had requested. Beau starts haggling the shopkeeper for better prices and Yasha scans the crowd. The man is openly staring at her now, watching from the middle of the marketplace.

Yasha folds her arms and frowns. "Beau," she says quietly. "We need to go."

Beau doesn't reply and Yasha turns to her. The monk is arguing loudly with the shopkeeper over some incense. Her brow is knit and her arms are thrust out in her frustration. Yasha feels a small smile creep over her lips.

She steps behind Beau, to shield her from the view of the mysterious man and kisses the top of the monk's head. Beau goes instantly rigid, argument forgotten, and she wheels to face the barbarian, looking surprised.

"We need to go," Yasha repeats, but doesn't explain.

* * *

 _Author's Note: yay for Critical Role! More Mighty Nein family affect coming in the form of possibly up to 50 more little drabbles like these. Some advice from Tumblr had me breaking this up, so here's the first 25 sections anyways._

 _As always, nicolewrites on Tumblr, nicole_writes on AO3_


	2. pt ii

_xxvi. tired kisses_

Nott has a button in her hand. Her fingers are curled so tightly around it that she can feel its little holes pressing into her palm. Her eyes stay fixed on the ground in front of her and she inhales deeply. She's tired–exhausted, really–but she can't sleep. She's been thinking too much about too many things and the gentle rocking of the boat isn't helpful.

For a moment, she considers going to find Fjord and forcing the half-orc to give her some kind of duty to do with the cannons, but she knows he'll recognize the exhaustion on her face. She isn't in the mood to have him be condescending towards her.

Caleb isn't in their room, he never seems to be, and Nott figures it's probably for the best. One of them always seems to have unhealthy sleep habits, and she doesn't want Caleb to know that he's been rubbing off on her.

The door to the room creeps open and a long silhouette falls in shadow across the room. Nott's hand whips to her crossbow, kept beside her bed, but she soon realizes it's just Caduceus. She drops it down and gives the firbolg a neutral look.

"I saw your light from my room," Caduceus says quietly. He steps into the room and walks over to Nott. "I would offer you some tea, but I know that's not exactly your choice beverage. Get some sleep, Nott. You'll need your strength."

Caduceus leans down and softly kisses the top of Nott's hair before turning and heading to leave again. As the cleric leaves, Nott fights off a huge yawn and uncurls her fingers from around the button.

* * *

 _xxvii. routine kisses_

Caduceus hums to himself quietly as he stirs the pot. The soup is coming along nicely and the tea would be ready soon. Beau and Fjord are out scouting, but Jester, Caleb, Nott and Yasha are sitting around the camp, minding their own business.

Jester is drawing, of course, and Yasha is striking a stone along the blade of her sword. Caleb is reading from one of the new arcane books he has managed to pick up and Nott is fiddling with a crossbow bolt while sitting on the ground next to the wizard. It feels normal for the group and it is calm. It's nice.

Caduceus finishes up with the soup and ladles it into five bowls. Beau and Fjord would get theirs when they came back. He hands Yasha and Jester theirs first and both girls thank him politely before returning to their previous actions. He approaches Nott and Caleb and the goblin jumps to her feet.

"I'll take those!" Nott says, reaching for both bowls. Caduceus doesn't question it and hands the two servings to the rogue. She places one right next to Caleb and Caduceus watches as Caleb turns and gently kisses Nott's brow without thinking too much of it before he goes right back to reading.

It is nice, Caduceus muses, this peace.

* * *

 _xxviii. surprise kisses_

Caleb's words are still ringing through Fjord's mind. His footsteps feel heavy and sluggish as he treks through the hallways of the inn. He finds the room he's looking for and his hand hesitates, just a small measure away from knocking against the door. He's frowning unconsciously and he really doesn't want to be doing this. Jester and Nott need a distraction. He has to be a distraction.

Avantika opens the door when he knocks and she looks unnervingly pleased to see him. After a moment, Bouldergut is dismissed and they are alone. For a moment there is nothing and Fjord wonders truly if the captain had truly wanted to discuss things with him. The shred of hope that perhaps she wants to discuss the next temple lingers only until she yanks him down and slams their lips together.

The action surprises him and Fjord's stomach sinks like a rock in the rippling ocean.

* * *

 _xxix. tentative kisses_

It has been a while since there have been any flowers for Yasha to press between the pages of the book she carries. The ocean was obviously not the best place to look for wildlife, but they are back on land again, at last.

Yasha looks for flowers as they travel, but the group is moving with urgency towards Felderwin, so there isn't really time to scour the land beyond what exists at the treeline. There are unspoken tensions hanging in the air and Yasha glances at Jester one day.

The tiefling looks happy, touching the pendant at her neck, and Yasha wonders what Jester is truly thinking about. She had been calm and insightful about Zuala, even despite the sadness in the tale that is uncharacteristic of Jester. She tries not to think too heavily about it.

The next day, as they are making camp before Alfield, Jester darts to her side. She presents Yasha with a small cluster of wildflowers and a bright smile. Yasha's heart tightens as she examines the tiny flowers. It is a touching gesture and she leans forward to kiss Jester gently on the cheek.

"Thank you," she says gently.

* * *

 _xxx. attention-drawing kisses_

"We really, really, really need to get out of here," Nott urges firmly.

"Well if we leave that way, the Crownsguard will be all over us," Fjord replies sharply, pointing towards the mouth of the alley they've taken temporary shelter in.

"Cause a distraction then!" Nott commands, crossing her arms. Beau, Caleb, Caduceus, and Yasha had the luck not to be corralled into an alley and had all escaped presumably back to the inn, leaving Jester, Fjord, and Nott stranded.

Jester perks up. "Nott, you hide. I have an idea." Nott doesn't wait to hear an explanation as she ducks behind a large crate and blends her small frame into the shadows.

"Jester, what are you talking about?" Fjord asks, his voice a low rumble.

Jester giggles. "Trust me."

There's a large crash like Jester has knocked something over and Nott tenses. She can't see either of her friends from where she's hidden, but she sees their shadows press against one alley wall together, but they're not attempting to hide.

Nott hears a single guard rush into the alley. Jester laughs again and Nott tenses, her hand hovers over her crossbow.

"Oh, no! Oh, we're so sorry! My boyfriend and I were just headed back to our inn and we got a little sidetracked!" Jester's voice is lilting and soft and Nott feels a tiny smile curl up her lips.

The guard mumbles a few annoyed phrases before he moves away and Nott hears yelling for the other guards to move on. She emerges from her hiding place and sees Jester smiling broadly and Fjord looking both mortified and startled. There's a glimmer of magic lingering around them like they had been disguised, but Fjord's hair is mussed just a little and Nott can clearly tell what has gone down between the pair. She bares her teeth at them in a grin.

"Let's go before Jester needs to cause another scene," she says. Fjord's face flushes.

* * *

 _xxxi. apologetic kisses_

"Nott?" Jester's voice is smaller than she would like as she peers into the dim room, looking for the goblin.

The former hunched on the far bed jerks and Nott's eyes glint in the low light as she looks at Jester, clearly surprised.

"Jester! What can I help you with?"

Jester steps into the room and feels almost too nervous to continue, but she swallows the pride holding her back and steps in fully.

"Why do you keep pushing Fjord and I together?"

Nott jumps from the bed and walks towards Jester. She reached out and slots her smaller hand into Jester's. "Because I can see that you like him, and even though I don't like him, you do, and therefore you deserve to get what you want."

Jester's eyes sting with unexpected tears as she gives Nott a weak smile. "Well, I don't know, Nott, it's all a little confusing. And we did just fight a dragon and I almost died and I don't know what I'm feeling anymore."

Without another word, Nott tugs and pulls Jester down so she can wrap her arms around the cleric's neck. She kisses the side of Jester's head and breathes slowly.

"I'm so sorry you're confused and I'm sorry we left you to face that dragon alone. You were so incredibly strong."

Jester squeezes Nott and doesn't reply, she just holds on.

* * *

 _xxxii. silencing kisses_

Fjord is talking again. He and Caleb have been going back and forth for more than an hour trying to figure out the best route to follow to hit all the important places. Molly leans forward, letting his elbows rest on the table and he studies the two.

Jester and Beau are off doing who knows what and Nott vanished to, presumably, go steal some shiny stuff, and that has left Molly with the two most serious members of the Mighty Nein.

Fjord points at something on the map and makes what is apparently a good point because Caleb makes a consenting noise low in his throat. Molly watched Fjord draw a line from one side of the map to the edge and Caleb's brow furrows.

Bored by the antics considering he was never really paying attention, Molly stands and walks towards the bar. As he passes Fjord, he kisses the half-orc on the top of the head and all the words coming from Fjord's mouth suddenly tumble to a stop as he's shocked into silence.

Molly hides a snicker as he makes his way to the bar. These folk are too affection deprived. He can fix that and he sure Jester would be happy to help.

* * *

 _xxxiii. neck kisses_

Beau barely gets the door shut behind her before strong arms are pressing her back. She makes a half-grunt, half-squeaking noise in response and Keg laughs. Beau cuts it off, bending over and kissing the dwarf firmly.

She tastes like ale and smoke and they're clumsy enough that it's going to be awkward. Keg kisses her back firmly before pulling back for air. Beau pulls at the fighter's armour and looks behind her to the bed.

"I think I have a better destination in mind," she mutters lowly.

Keg basically growls in response and Beau smirks, pushing her by the shoulders.

After some armour removal at record speed, Beau has the dwarf pressed against the mattress, both of their chests heaving. Beau's smirk widens. She steals one last kiss on the lips before she goes for the neck.

* * *

 _xxxiv. gentle kisses_

Everything about the Mighty Nein is a bit of an oxymoron. Firstly, there's seven of them normally and they don't often feel very mighty. When Kiri trills out an exact replica of any of their voices, it throws Fjord off guard. She's just a small child, but she does bring their numbers up to eight which is a little closer to the nine that people expect.

But, she's a kid and they can't expect to keep dragging a young girl into such dangerous situations, so when they decide to leave her with the Schusters, it is for the better. Still, Kiri has grown on them and they love her completely. The girls of the group take the departure of their kenku friend harder than Fjord or Molly or Caleb does, but they're all sad to see her go.

Fjord's chest twists as he watches Jester kneel before the tiny bird. Her eyes water and she looks at Kiri deeply. Fjord knows a bit more about Jester than any of the others and he's curious how much her own relationship with her mother affects how she feels about the young girl. She's certainly not the only one because Fjord remembers how he felt upon finding the Schuster kids in the beginning.

Jester hugs Kiri and presses a gentle kiss to the top of her head. "You are always one of the Mighty Nein, Kiri! And remember that we love you very much!"

Kiri trills sadly. "Love you very much!"

Fjord places a hand on Jester's shoulder and she looks up at him with misty eyes. Her hand covers his and she squeezes gently.

* * *

 _xxxv. fingertip kisses_

Beau flexes her fingers and the pain that shoots through her knuckles makes her wince. Something is definitely bruised and from the speed that the blue has spread across her hands, it's likely broken too. She glances across the clearing and takes in the rest of the party.

Jester is kneeling next to Caleb who is ghostly white and covered in blood and filth. He's fragile and it had only taken the orc two good swings to put the wizard out and Jester had thankfully gotten to his side in time. Fjord is talking in hushed words with Mollymauk who is looking at Nott where the goblin is hovering around Caleb and Jester, trying to help, but also trying to stay out of the way.

Beau grits her teeth. Her hands hurt, but she can't exactly ask Jester for help at the moment since Caleb needs her magic more. She turns and sits on a log, digging through her bag for something she can wrap her fingers with. She jerks out a half-squished roll of bandages and starts trying to wrap her left hand.

Hands descend from above, catching hers and halting her in her place. Beau jerks her eyes up and sees Yasha, stoic-faced, standing above her. She stops trying to wrap her hands as Yasha observes her carefully.

A soft white glow suddenly emanates from Yasha's hands, spreading over Beau's injured knuckles. The healing magic prickles, but it seems to work. Yasha lifts Beau's mostly healed hands and presses a soft kiss to the very tips of her fingers and it sends a spark shooting through Beau a lot stronger than the tingle from Yasha's magic.

"You'll be needing your hands in top quality," Yasha says quietly.

"Yeah," Beau mumbles, unable to tear her eyes from the barbarian. "Thanks."

* * *

 _xxxvi. amused kisses_

Caleb turns a page in his book, back turned to the excitement of the bar. He's pretty sure that Jester had just punched Beau in the face and he has to go back to his book to hide an amused smile. It seems too on par for everything that's happened so far.

The book he picked up in Zadash has all sorts of weird ritual circles drawn through the pages, but so far there are no spells that he doesn't recognize. It's almost frustrating, but the circles are enough to keep him leafing through the rest of the pages, hoping for something new through it all.

A hand grabs his arm suddenly and it takes every ounce of control he has not to turn and blast a firebolt at whoever is holding him. Instead, he tenses and glances over to see a beaming Jester at his side. Her lip is split but she's grinning and adrenaline has coloured her cheeks darker.

"Hello, Jester," he greets slowly.

"Caleb! Did you see us fight! It was absolutely awesome! Beau and I totally beat the shit out of each other!" Jester seems genuinely happy and excited and Caleb's lips curl into a gentle smile.

"Couldn't you have healed yourself?"

Jester winks. "I did! But I left the lip because it makes me look cool."

The comment finally breaks Caleb's facade and he lets out an amused chuckled. He turns towards Jester fully and presses a kiss to her cheek. She's odd, but incredibly endearing. Jester beams and throws her arms around him for a tight hug in return.

* * *

 _xxxvii. height difference kisses_

Everyone is reeling. With all the information and history that exploded across the group, Nott is surprised that she has kept it together.

It hurts to be home in Felderwin and not be able to hold her son and her husband, but Luke is safe with Edith and Yeza is _gone_. The cart rattles around the edges of the city and Nott can see the pain on Caleb's face and the darkness that lingers in Beau's and the questions that bleed from everyone else's faces. Nott knows that Jester's dying to ask questions, but there's a silence in the cart that is suffocating.

She looks more closely at Caleb. He's still gripping Beau's shoulder for stability and his face is white as ash. She's seen this look on him before, but it hurts more now because she knows he's not just Caleb and she's finally learned most of the pain that he went through with his parents and with Ikithon.

The pain and silence are killing Nott. She scrambles out of the cover and heads to the front, where Caduceus is calmly driving the cart. The firbolg casts her a careful look, but he looks calm and composed, as he always does.

"Nott," he says gently, "we are going to find your husband. The Assembly won't be using him any longer."

A ball of tension loosens in her stomach and she stands on the seat next to Caduceus. Even standing while he sits, he's taller, so she has to lean up on her toes to kiss his cheek. No words are needed after that and the two sit at the front of the cart, Nott with her hood pulled over her head to hide her features.

* * *

 _xxxviii. 'just acting' kisses_

"This is a bad idea," Fjord says stiffly. Caleb watches him cross his arms over his chest, yellow eyes storming.

Beau lets out a long sigh. "You think I don't know that? None of us are getting in there with magic and Caleb and I are the ones who know the most about the Empire. My Cobalt Soul credentials get us in as," she pauses to shudder lightly, "newlyweds, and then Caleb knows what we're looking for during this stupid party."

"I'm with Fjord," Nott pipes up. "You don't know who will be there and there's a possibility someone will see through it immediately."

Caleb kneels in front of Nott. "But I'm very charismatic my friend, and Beau is a brilliant liar. I need those books and we need to find out what they're planning."

Jester taps a finger against her chin. "Well, Caleb, Beau, we'd better see a demonstration of your newlywed adoration. For practice, of course."

Beau frowns, but she steps close to Caleb and slides her arm through his. They're both horribly stiff and unconvincing as she presses the tiniest kiss to his cheek before recoiling quickly. Caleb glances around at their companions to gauge their reaction. Caduceus is blissfully unaware of what is going on, but Fjord and Nott both look far less than impressed.

Jester grabs Caleb and Beau each by the hand, smiling broadly. "You two need to relax! It's just acting, after all."

* * *

 _xxxix. nose kisses_

Yasha still feels like there is lightning coursing through her body. She can't forget the feeling of it striking her and the smell of burning wood and ozone. She spreads her fingers flat against the table and stares at her scarred hands against the dark wood in the dim light of the ship's galley.

She had held lightning and a spirit in her hand and it had made her feel more alive than anything in a long while. Not for the first time, Yasha wondered what Zuala would think of the Stormlord and the chaos that surrounded Yasha every time she pursued him. She also wanted to know what Zuala would have thought of the Mighty Nein.

She would have found them to be an eccentric bunch, but still charming nonetheless. Between the lot of them, there was rather a lot of charisma oozing around powerful personalities. Even after all this time travelling with them, they still puzzled Yasha sometimes too. Besides Caduceus, not one of them spoke of their true feelings and it made Yasha miss Molly even more.

The door to the galley swung open and Yasha turned, pulling her hands into her lap. Nott stood in the doorway, just looking at her in confusion.

"Did you fight a lightning beast?" the goblin asks after a moment.

Yasha shrugs because she's still not quite sure what exactly she had fought. Nott jumps up onto the table so that she's standing on it and it now a little taller than Yasha who's seated. Yasha blinks as Nott steps forward and kisses her nose.

"I'm sure you were very brave."

* * *

 _xl. forehead kisses_

Caleb's scars are hurting. They always seem to be, but today is worse than normal. Perhaps, he thinks darkly, it is because Beau and Yasha saw Master Ikithon yesterday and from what Beau had said, Ikithon had taken particular interest in Yasha. The thought makes his stomach twist, but he forces it down.

Around the room, his alarm spell is unbroken and Caleb exhales slowly. He hadn't expected it to be broken, but paranoia for old time's sake had won out when he had spread it around the room. Nott hadn't said a word, for her part, and he had been grateful.

Caleb likes the Mighty Nein. But, he also feels like he is using them for his own means to an end. It is wrong to abuse good people in such a way. With tense shoulders and tight nerves, he sets about dismantling his alarm system quietly. Nott is still asleep on the bed on the other side of the room. Sometimes she would sleep curled at his feet, but last night she had crawled into the other bed without much spoken between them.

She had known he had needed his space after that ordeal. Plus, she and Beau knew everything now and the thought of it twists Caleb's insides so viciously he is almost sick.

Caleb pauses in his removal of the alarm and crosses to Nott's bed. He leans over and kisses her forehead softly. She doesn't stir. "Danke, mein kleiner freund," he murmurs gently.

* * *

 _xli. parental kisses_

Caduceus drives the cart for a long time and just listens. Caleb and Nott–Bren and Veth, his brain corrects gently–have been through a lot individually and together. Their stories are painful and clearly taxing on the tellers themselves. From his brief observations, Nott does not make eye contact while she speaks and Caleb grabs for Beau like a lifeline.

Finally, he pulls the cart to a stop and looks at the group. They all need sleep, undoubtedly. They make for the inn in a relative silence, but Caduceus watches Caleb's feet drag and his head hangs. The cleric drops to the back of the party next to the wizard and stops him just before he enters the tavern.

His hands lie against Caleb's shoulders and the wizard glances up at him, his eyes dark and full of relived pain.

"It's going to be okay, Mr. Caleb," Caduceus says gently.

"You do not think less of me? For hiding all of these secrets?"

Caduceus shakes his head. "This was clearly a difficult thing for you, so you have done just fine." He presses a gentle kiss to the top of Caleb's head and releases his shoulders. "Now, let us rest tonight."

* * *

 _xlii. frustrated kisses_

"You should not be here, Beauregard," Dairon says. Her voice is stiff and has an edge of anger to it.

Beau ignores her mentor's obvious feelings and just throws her arms around her. "I thought you were dead."

Dairon stiffly pushes Beau back until they can make eye contact. "Yes, that was kind of the point."

Beau drops her arms to her sides and just listens as Dairon explains her surprise and the reason behind her deception and the story of Blade Garden. After a moment, Dairon pauses and opens the subject for discussion.

Jester says something, but Beau can't focus on anything else but the person before her. "You're not the slightest bit proud that I've made it this far without getting killed."

Dairon rolls her eyes. "You likely would have died in that ring if I hadn't stepped up."

Beau shrugs. "I still almost beat you, didn't I?"

Dairon's posture slumps a bit as she exhales deeply. "Yes, I suppose you did."

Beau pauses before hugging her mentor tightly again. "I still can't believe you're here."

Again, Dairon is stiff beneath her touch, but this time an arm comes up to wrap around her in return. A quick, fleeting kiss is pressed to the side of her head as the monk embrace.

"I am proud of you, Beauregard, you have learned well and developed much since I saw you last."

Warmth curls through Beau's stomach as she clutches the only adult figure who she ever truly respected.

* * *

 _xliii. cautious kisses_

Jester is bouncing on her toes. Excitement and positivity radiates off her and makes her almost glow. Fjord finds himself wishing for a bit of her optimism. Molly stands nearby her, spinning his swords around his hands with practiced ease and Yasha is sitting just behind him, both hands clutching the hilt of the Magician's Judge as the blade sinks an inch or two into the dirt.

Fjord turns and finds Beau standing beside Caleb as she tightens the bindings on her hands, her staff hitched over her back. Caleb is flipping through his spellbook, thoroughly distracted, but Nott, who stands on Caleb's other side, is staring right at Fjord.

She looks from Fjord to the entrance to the ring and her yellow eyes flash darkly.

Fjord sighs. "Hey, guys, remember this is just a competition, it's not a matter of life or death."

Molly laughs. "What, a competition of pride isn't life or death to you folks? That's awfully boring." He slides his swords into their sheath and drapes an arm over Jester's shoulders, grinning. "We're the Mighty Nein, so I don't think we'll have to worry too much about a combat bout."

"Fjord is correct," Caleb interjects. "We should be cautious."

Molly shrugs and Jester turns towards him, also smiling. "Still," she says lightly, "we can be cautious and victorious." Twisting so her horns don't knock against Molly's she leans up and kisses him on the cheek.

Then she looks back at the rest of the Nein and Fjord feels her violet eyes stare right through him as her infectious positivity warms him.

"Okay then," he mumbles.

* * *

 _xliv. collarbone kisses_

The circus has been his home since he clawed his way out of the ground. He knows these people and he trusts these people and it kills him to see them get taken away. But, there is no denying that the Crownsguard have reason to suspect the circus considering an old man turned into a zombie-creature during their performance.

After the whole ordeal, Molly sheaths his sword and finds himself standing next to Yasha. She slings her greatsword onto her back and turns towards him. Unexpectedly, she pulls him into a tight embrace. Molly hugs her back tightly because he knows what this means. She's taller than him so his lips, at the angle she has pulled him in, are just above her shoulder.

He cranes his neck and presses them lightly to her collarbone, as a comfort. When she releases him, her eyes are stormy.

"Be safe then," he offers lamely.

Yasha dips her head. "You as well."

Molly turns back to the astonished faces of the new people he just met and knows that if he looks back, Yasha will be gone.

* * *

 _xlv. spine kisses_

The whole event is over before Fjord realizes much of what's going on, and soon he's just lying next to an equally nude pirate captain. He hopes he has bought the group enough time to do what they need to do because he does not want to be here any longer than he needs to be.

After a moment, Avantika sits up and begins wresting her long hair into a braid of sorts. Her back is to him and Fjord is able to observe the arcing tattoo that covers her skin as it curls from around her shoulders down to the base of her spine.

"Well," Avantika says, as she ties off her braid. "I want to check the ship before it gets too late, but you're welcome to stay here and wait for me."

The image of Avantika catching Jester and Nott red-handed makes him internally panic and he leans towards her, letting his charisma swell overtop his fear. "Or you could stay," he offers instead.

He leans down, but instead of going to her face as she expects, he aims for the marked skin on her upper back and kisses one of the ridges of her spine. She shivers against him.

"Well with an argument like that," she teases and Fjord swallows roughly.

* * *

 _xlvi. flirtatious kisses_

"Jester, wait up!" Beau reached out and grabbed Jester's arm, to pull her to a stop.

Jester stopped, but Frumpkin jumped down off her shoulder and bolted back to where Caleb was standing at the mouth of the alley. Jester turned and gave Beau and inquisitive look.

Beau shuffled her feet awkwardly and looked back at the shed where she'd seen her mentor. "Thank you." At first, that was all she could say, but then she straightened her shoulders and continued. "For fighting in the ring with me and for meeting Dairon with me. It means a lot to me."

Jester smiled brightly. "Of course, Beau! We're best friends!" A coy look crept over the tiefling's face as she considered something. "But really, are you sure you're not secretly in love with me?"

Beau rolled her eyes. "You know I love you, Jessie."

Jester beamed and turned to walk towards Caleb and the main city. She turned once she got halfway there and blew Beau a joking, flirtatious kiss.

* * *

 _xlvii. hot kisses_

Caleb's chest feels impossibly tight when he sees Nott fall. He steps out and the Polymorph spell is leaving his lips before he can even think. His heart does not stop pounding until Caduceus has stone shaped the wall behind them and they have fled far enough that the pounding from the fire giants has faded to almost nothing.

The party slows to a halt, everyone heaving with lack of air, and Caleb's eyes find Nott. She's singed and looks dead tired, but she is alive. He steps towards her, pushing away Beau's arms which had been cradling her. Caleb kneels and pulls Nott to his chest, just holding her and letting himself breathe for a moment.

Her hands squeeze him back, her nails digging in a little, but he cannot bring himself to be bothered by that manner. He rests his forehead against hers and mumbles something in Zemnian under his breath. He pulls away slightly and examines her for any damage. She's still hurt, but the healing has helped her significantly.

He kisses her forehead and her skin is still hot to the touch, but he will take hot over dead any day.

* * *

 _xlviii. cold kisses_

Jester can still feel the burn from the crackle of electricity. She winds her arms around herself and sinks further against the wood of the base of the crow's nest. For the moment, she had needed to be as far away from the water as possible, so this seemed like a good alternative. Now that she was up this high, she thinks about falling and then she thinks about falling into a dark cavern lit by the lightning of a dragon.

She shivers again.

It's raining, but Jester barely feels it. Her clothes are damp from the sea spray, so the extra added water from the rain doesn't make her feel any worse or any better. Her arms curl atop her knees and she squints at the horizon.

There's a creak of rope grinding against wood and she turns her head. Fjord is leaning over the top of the rope ladder, half in the crow's nest, looking at her.

"Hey, Jester, are you doing okay?"

"Totally, I'm totally fine, definitely," she says quickly. She's pretty sure she sounds convincing, but Fjord's eyebrows knit and he climbs fully up.

"Do you want to talk about it? It's okay to be scared after something like that."

"I was so alone," she mumbles tiredly.

Fjord reaches for one of her hands. His skin is cool against hers thanks to the rain, and he brings it up to his face. He kisses her knuckles quickly and doesn't break eye contact with her. She squeezes his hand in return and feels a tiny smile curl up the corners of her mouth.

* * *

 _xlix. 'don't go' kisses_

The ground around him is already slippery with blood, but Caleb reaches for Mollymauk's unmoving body anyways, pulling him as upright as he can get him. There's a trickle of blood from each of the tiefling's wide open red eyes as well as a trail alongside his mouth from where he had spat at Lorenzo.

Not for the first time, Caleb wishes for Jester and the others. Beau says something behind him and he hears Keg's armour clank as she falls hopelessly to the ground, but everything is numb besides the sight of the lifeless body half-clutched in his arms.

The numbness stays as they respectfully bury Mollymauk, leaving his cloak draped over his grave. They leave him a letter just in case, but then they have to move on and Caleb has to feel again.

The anger comes before the sadness. It is unbridled anger and fury towards Lorenzo and the Iron Shepherds and they will pay for what they have done. The sadness and the grief comes next as a dark piercing feeling.

Caleb turns as they begin walking away. "Shine bright, Circus Man," he says carefully. He touches his fingers to his lips and then extends them in the direction of the coat as it flaps in the breeze.

* * *

 _l. 'wake up' kisses_

Caleb is squishy. Nott knows this, Caleb knows this, and so does everyone else in the Mighty Nein. Still, Nott is gripped with panic when the arrows sink into his flesh. She watches his blue eyes widen and the fire loose itself from his fingertips before he falls to his knees and then back onto his back.

She scrabbles towards him, grabbing his hand, as Jester takes the other one and casts Cure Wounds. Nott kisses Caleb's hand briefly and stares at his face.

"Wake up, Caleb!" Jester implores. Nott squeezes the limp hand.

Beau and the others are bickering with what is left of the bandits, but Caleb stirs on the hard-packed earth before he shoots up into a sitting position, blue eyes as wide as a madman's.

"Take them out!" he cries desperately. Nott furrows her brow. She touches his hand to reassure him, but his eyes are a million miles away.

* * *

 _Well, it's been awhile, but ep 53 was great, so I was feeling inspired! Might be a bit before the last update, but I might have something else in store before then!_

\- Nicole


End file.
